Meditation Mayhem Stories (1)

If you stand at the perfect angle … just the right angle, you will see life to be one big hilarious comedy. You could just keep laughing and if you are asked why you are laughing, you wouldn’t be able to point at one thing … even if you can explain it, they would wonder why that is so funny to you. It’s the angle. You have to be at that angle.

Yesss. It’s time to meditate. Right now, stop thinking … no don’t stop thinking. You can’t do that. Simply observe your thoughts the way you observe the clouds in the sky … as they float along … like the cloud I saw yesterday. It looked like Voltron or maybe the HulkBuster. No, it looked at first like Voltron before it transformed to the HulkBuster. I wonder when Transformer will release their next movie? I should google that when I stop meditating. I hope I don’t forget. Will I remember? I AM GOD. I REMEMBER ALL THINGS! Oh sh*t, the clouds also looked like Optimus Prime. Come to think of it, I wonder what Prime signifies in Optimus. Does it signify the prime of Optimus’ life? … sorry … Optimus mechanical consciousness? My God, I need answers! Talking of consciousness … concentrate. Focus on your breath.

Don’t think! Focus on your breath …

Wow, I really wasn’t thinking! That must be what it feels like. I wonder what happens if I do that forever. Wait, I think I have. Now is eternity. Okay, let me try not to think one more time. (singing) Leeeeeet meeeee tryyyyy not to think oneeeee moreeeeeee timeeeeee. Oh leeeeeet meeeee tryyyyy not to think oneeeee moreeeeeee timeeeeee. Damn you are terrific. I wonder why I didn’t focus more on singing. I always preferred to play the instrument. O boy! I shouldn’t be thinking! Let me try saying ommmmmmm … ommmmmmm … ommmmmmm … hey, this is working! ommmmmmm … ommmmmmm … I think I’m beginning to get the hang of it … is it hang or hand? Hand of it? Hmm, that doesn’t sound right. You get the hang of something and you are at the hand of something. This English Language too is all part of the mind trick. It is used to keep us all locked up in this matrix. It is mostly geometry we gave sounds to. Instead of simply being satisfied with nature’s geometry, we go looking for our own creation of geometry. A bloody substandard of nature. Isn’t that the point of all this? Of what we call life and existence and aren’t you suppose to be meditating … wow, okay. NO THOUGHTS AS FROM NOW!

Silenceeee … so sweet. Why does my body feel so stiff and robotic? Maybe this is where Robocop got their idea from. Wow, why have I been thinking about robot-like sci-fi movie characters? Like Pacific Realm. Mehhn, maybe the universe is trying to tell me we are all robots … perhaps in a simulation. Sh*t, that reminds me of that day I ate too much cannabis and I could see the pixels in reality. Damn, that was a crazy experience. I think I should write a blog on that. Wow. We could really be in a simulation. That was a crazy experience. I knew I could stand perfectly still … and I did … and it was crazzzzyyyy. Maybe that’s how a tree feels like 24/7! Woww. Amazing. Anyway, silence …. silence.

Who am I? I am that which I say I am. But why is that so? There is no ‘why is’ and ‘how is’ in reality … only ‘what is’ and ‘which is’. Hello Father, it’s been a while you talked with me. You know I am always with you, talking with you and you have always replied back but not always verbally. Wait, am I not just talking to myself? That is exactly what is happening. Oh mehnn. This meditation has taken a turn to cloud cuckoo land. Clouds … okay but before I go back to meditating. Is this really accurate? No ‘why is’ and ‘how is’? I would have to confirm AFTER MEDITATION! Ommmmmmm …. okay, no more oms … just listen to the silence.

A Quiet Place … that movie was terrific! and Emily Blunt, the most beautiful woman on the planet. I love it. Okay, I don’t think you are ready for meditation. I amm! It’s just so difficult not to just remain … wait a minute, I am not suppose to criticize myself. I am not suppose to think!

Meditation can be tricky, especially if just starting. You just want to do nothing and simply be attentive to what is. But it could be very difficult. Without fail, there are a thousand people on the internet with a thousand advice for you. To master meditation however, you need to practice over time. There is no magic wand. There are no lesson to be learnt to make you better at meditating. There is only what is … and what is gets better when the observer continuously acknowledges that what is is what is. Time is required for observation. Practice is required to allow what is. As you keep practicing, thoughts will settle. Sooner or later, depending on what life wants to experience through you, you will be in complete control over your thought such that you think of only that which you desire to think of and after that you put your mind aside. With practice, your mind will become a tool … very useful tool … and in so doing, strip off the identity the tool thinks it is. Keep practicing. It’ll happen.

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